the dumb within the smart

hey, its been awhile.

its 21st May which means its a day before the tickets for iKONCERT in Malaysia is released but i'm still trynna get approval from my parents and somehow its getting impossible by every try in persuading thanks to my physics exam paper recently. why? well i sort of left all the questons in Section C which consists of 32 marks cause i was terribly in a hatred situation with myself during the exams. Firstly, I really hate physics(i love teacher roshaya but my brain keeps on rejecting the formulas) and secondly, i'm literally a slow learner(?). I don't even know why i didn't obeyed my mum's order to change into an accounting class even though i really hated science since forever. well actually i do know why but yea i can't believe i've let such stupid reasons to stop myself from pursuing something that is within my capability and pushed myself into believing i'll survive a pure science class. nylea & bio .. thats the funniest thing ever. I know i should be grateful that i was lucky enough to be entering such a class with such good teachers and super fun.loving.awesome classmates but i'm truly sorry for myself for not having even a pinch of interest in bio. i took in what my mother advised me to & tried having the urge of wanting to know but oh man its hard. we're talking about nylea, who is known for her lazyass and stupidity lvl 100++. i got google but i aint got the love to wait it to load and to scan the whole text from top to bottom. but srsly i tried. but oh my god it gets me hating it more every time. sometimes i cry while doing my homework and i've cried in class before sbb i didn't understand what the teacher was talking abt. i feel bad for tchr hasnida for having to deal with such an imbecile student like me. i love you teacher and i am always thankful for u being my teacher, i wouldn't want anyone else. and-- for her, i'd challenge myself to something new and u, my beloved readers would be my witness . I've stated why im a no go with physics, chemistry & bio but even so i have to work my way through cause you know why?

Allah puts me in this path cause He believes i could do it. even though im having doubts of this probably being the reason of me having to learn a new major from a to z ((Na'uzubillahiminalzalik))
i'll push myself first. I'll do my best. cause theres no turning back now cause its friggin May aka 2nd semester aldy. so push myself and do my best. its okay to cry and its okay to break down in between but i gotta make sure i'll lift myself up again. i can do it fosho !!! if the heart wants it, i CAN achieve it. Insha'Allah , May Allah ease everything for us all. Amin. 

sudden ending as usual but thats all from me, i'm sorry for any flaws throughout my text above. it was sincerely from my heart straight to the keyboard. thank you for reading, xx. 


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