"Jangan rosakkan diri untuk orang lain"

 Assalamualaikum & hi everyone <3


Before I start, may I make it clear that this is my safe space. Always has, always been and will forever be. This part of the internet has always been my go-to every time I feel like there is no where for me in this world. Why ? Because no one knows about it here. So what is left here, stays hidden here and I don't plan to ever commercialise this part of me to the world no matter how good my writing will one day be. I've said what i've said so whatever you read next is up to you. Any info you got about me from here is for you to decide wether you'd like to keep it safe for me or use it against me. I'll use the little faith I have in humanity to trust you. 


So again, assalamualaikum & hi my loves. *shrieks in excitement because i miss writing so bad* 


I'm currently sitting at the table in my room, facing the back view of my house with headphones on, playing them slow, soft beautiful galau songs.  Just took my meds and made some warm honey lemon tea because your girl is down with a bad cough. Still, I feel good tho. Are you guys good ? How are you guys ? Korang okay ? I hope you guys are. We gotta have each other back these days cause I don't trust them big smiles and tenang ig stories anymore. We all be keeping dark dark secrets now huh ? We're all so big. So responsible. Too responsible that we keep our own pain and struggle so deep down and far away from others, hoping it would save them from the trouble. Are you like that ? I hope not. 


Don't get me wrong, I don't condemn you for acting strong or thinking you have your shit together but I just wanna tell you that you are allowed to feel weak and depend on others too. Maybe not always but once in awhile when things get too heavy for one man to carry them weights. 


I wish you reach out. I wish you seek help. I wish you have the strength to muster up them courage to just fight through everything that is thrown at you. I'm wishing you all this bukan sebab I nak act as if I terpaling faham you tapi sebab I needed to project it to someone else in order for me to digest these words. Ramai yang bagitahu I tapi masuk telinga kanan, keluar telinga kiri. Susah bila kita dah stuck dalam cycle yang toxic dengan diri kita. Kita hukum diri, kita kejam dengan diri kita. Tapi pernah tak terpikir, for what cost ? 


Do you realize that no one is actually keeping count of  everything you do. The only person who notices every change, every fails and every milestone achieved by you is you. So stop looking around you and comparing yourself to others. Focus on you, acknowledge your own wins, appreciate the lesson filled mistakes and always always be nice to yourself cause in the end what matters most is the opportunities you seized and the love you get and give. 


Jangan rosakkan diri untuk orang lain. Sayang diri korong. Baik dengan diri korang. 


Comments

  1. Anonymous10 September 2024 at 23:27

    Ahhh im crying reading this :’) I wished Ive the courage to ask for some help :’)

    ReplyDelete

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